www.neil.blog memo to myself. do the dumb things i gotta do. touch the puppet head.

I lost $1,000 in financial aid, because I initally said I was living on campus, but now I’m not. I also lost my federally subsidized loan, which means now I have to pay interest, or something. This is a major setback, because I took out another loan to pay for school + a down payment on a car. Now I don’t have anything left for a car. Basically, this sucks because I will be paying off college loans until I’m about 90.

I start class tomorrow, I’m not really nervous, except I’m worried because as usual, I ate an entire pack of Trident today and my tummy hurts. Wish me luck with my first day back, plz.

I got drunk last night and had a long discussion with someone about something that has been bothering me a lot lately, but I didn’t know how to talk about it. I went out with a lot of girls this summer. Nothing really serious, just a lot of dinner dates and hangouts and going to shows and such. Mostly really beautiful girls, because srsly do I hang out with uglies? No. But I’m not even sexually attracted to anyone. When I look at girls, I think things like hey, that girl’s cute and looks like we’d get along, I’d like to get to know her and maybe we can be friends. Popular male consensus shows that I should thinking things more along the lines of damn check out those tits, and nice ass, yo I’d hit that. I look at a girl and check out how many freckles she has.

I don’t think I’m gay, because I don’t really see myself with another guy. I guess this rules me out from being bi, because I’m not really sexually attracted to either sex. Pretty much this sucks because I don’t even enjoy masturbation.

Okay, that was sufficiently awkward. Laurenface gave me her old phone, so now I have one again. 774.276.0679. I’m not working tomorrow after school, so if you want to hang out in the afternoon, holla. Blowjobs greatly appreciated so hopefully we can sort this dilemma out.

First day of orientation yesterday. Totally boring. Met some nice people. Made it totally worth it.

Highlights included questions such as “is a parking pass the same as a parking permit?” and “how does the wireless internet work? does it like, work for AOL?” Oh well. I’m looking forward to a good year.

After reading the same Onion article 3 times and laughing every time, I realized that I need to find someone with the same sense of humor as me so we can laugh about this dumb shit. I feel dumb sending links to people with things that I find hillarious but nobody else does. The best thing I did all day was read an editorial written by a goat. Five times.

Today I was going to leave work at 2 and go to the second day of orientation, but I was so busy, I couldn’t. We have all these huge clients now, companies with hundreds of stores in malls all accross the country, and there are a lot of issues.. and I am getting really stressed, trying to take care of everything, and trying to help coworkers and get their issues sorted as well. I think Adam’s training is going well, which is a big help because we were (and still are) understaffed. I guess I could have left early like I had planned, but since Friday is my day off, my workload on Monday would have been huge (I work alone on the weekends, so all I can do is answer calls, not work on existing issues). One thing that relieved some stress was that my boss said he knows I’ve been working hard and I’ll see some positive reflection in January’s pay raise. That makes me happy (the recognition of a job well done, not the money). After work I skated to Coney Island, and my mom was outside waiting for my brother to finish his piano lesson.. so we got hot dogs. I love my mom.

Tomorrow is day 3 of orientation, I have to be up early so I should probably go to bed. Don’t think I’m doing anything tomorrow night..

Oh yeah. And BEFORE the obligatory “end-of-summer recap” entry, let me just say that I feel the entire summer would have been a waste if I hadn’t met Crystalyn and her awesome friends (Josh and Anna, that’s you guys).

Thanks to TonyJ, and the Interwebs, I have the new Coheed. Ask if you want it. And yes, I’ll probably buy it when it comes out.

Bought my books for school, schedule is good, I still need a laptop. Orientation tomorrow.. I hear it’s lame. We’ll see. I’m going to try to bail out early to go to dinner for Kirsten’s birthday.

Gas went up, again, about 30 cents from the last time I checked.. probably going to be $3 by the end of September, if not sooner.

Dear everyone that drives an SUV or other uneconomical vehicle: fuck you. I don’t want to break open the nation’s oil reserves so you assholes can use it all in 2 days.

Who wants to hang out for the last week of my summer?

This summer went by so fast, it’s crazy. It’s because of my work schedule.. I lost track of time. I haven’t really been talking to anyone, so people are thinking I’m ignoring them (Sean, I’m not). I only have about 2 weeks before I go back to school.. I’m kind of excited. I got the letter yesterday that said I did well enough on the writing prompt that I can skip English Comp 101 and go right to 102. So excitement city. I’m living at home for school, but I’m going to try to make some changes in my room that will make it easier to study.. like cleaning, and getting my computer out of there so I can have more space on my desk. And getting a new chair.

kthx

I want to buy an ibook. They’re cute.

I’m training Kendall at work tomorrow, that should be fun. I don’t know if I’ll be able to get up tomorrow but I’ll try.

Got drunk for the first time the other night at Erika’s, it was sweet until I started to feel like shit. But people were nice to me, and gave me water, and back rubs, and told me it was gonna be okay and that “shit if I had known that was your first time I wouldn’t have let you drink that much!”. Luckily I didn’t throw anything up or do anything embarassing, except show up to work with a hangover and fall asleep at my desk. Then I hung out with Shanon later that day after work and we made fun of each other. Saw 40 Year Old Virgin with Rene, and also other people but they didn’t sit with us up at the top 🙁 Oh, and we saw Red Eye last week, strongly reccomended.

Rene bought our tickets for Death Cab in September! And I guess she bought 2 extra accidentally so if anyone wants to come with us, they’re $31, center balcony at the Orpheum in Boston. Holla!

Okay, bed.

I went to a party last night at Derrick’s. After everyone left, me and Rene went upstairs to chill for a while. We talked about sweet random stuff, and then kind of dozed off. My parents don’t like it when I come home later than 12 or 1, and it was 1:30, and I just closed my eyes for a second and then woke up and it was 6:15. I freaked out, said bye to Rene, and drove home as fast as I could.

Got home, crept through the front door, snuck up the stairs, and passed out in my bed until 2 in the afternoon. Took a shower and wondered how I would explain this to my parents. Maybe I could pretend nothing happened, or something.

I walked in to the living room where my dad was sitting with my brothers watching TV, wondering how long I was going to be grounded for. After about 10 minutes:

my dad: how come you weren’t in bed at 5 in the morning?
me: I was at Derrick’s, I fell asleep
my dad: oh
me: sorry
my dad: HEY PUT THAT R KELLY VIDEO BACK ON.

A similar conversation ensued with my mom, then I went to work.

..

Someone yell at me, or something. I’m thinking it’s a trick, or who even knows. These are the same parents that would flip out if I came home 10 minutes late from the Java Hut on a school night. So I don’t really know what’s going on. I know I’m 18 and it shouldn’t matter what time I come home, but I still feel like that since I’m living in their house I owe them some respect as to not show up at 6 in the morning. Whatever, it’s just weird.

Also, read THIS. It’s one of my customers, talking about me on this forum.

My mom just referred to blueberries as “bloobs” and I laughed a lot.

Summer school “graduation” is on Thursday. I don’t think they ever did that before, but there are about 20 kids that didn’t graduate so whatever. I think that will be embarassing.. I just want them to mail me my diploma.

I registered for fall classes at Worcester State. I did the placement test and did well enough that I have to go back next week and write this essay on something, and if I do well I get to skip English Comp 101 and go right to 102. And I tested at a (high school) Spanish III level, somehow, even though I haven’t taken that class in 2 years, and did shitty in it. And just picked random letters for most of the questions.

I started to type out my schedule, but decided not to. Instead, here’s the classes I’m taking: