www.neil.blog memo to myself. do the dumb things i gotta do. touch the puppet head.

January 7, 2006

i’m gonna make it through this year, if it kills me

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: — lj @ 9:35 am

My sleeping cycle got messed up, so every day I can’t fall asleep until 4 in the morning, and wake up around 3 in the afternoon. Then I go to work until midnight, read for a few hours, and do the whole thing over again. My car broke on New Years Eve. A few hundred to fix the brakes. A few hundred to fix the radiator. And the emergency brake is broken too!! A thousand dollars or more to fix. That’s.. about how much I paid for the car. fuck.

I wish I had a time machine so I could go back to when I was 16 and just buy a car for a few thousand, a nice car, and not have to worry about this shit every few months! I miss the Volvo, Century, Caravan, Escort, and LeSabre :(:(:( actually my dad is letting me drive the LeSabre for now, until we figure out what’s going on with the Park Ave I HATE CARS and they all have dumb names.

ALSO HI EVERYONE, I GOT OVER MY EPIC MANY-YEARS LONG CRUSH. Yes, yes, thank you. Then I started to like another girl, but she likes someone else! Sweet! I’m lonely! I need to lower my standards probably. But let’s talk about happy things! Too many people already complain about being lonely on Livejournal. I can’t wait until spring so I can go camping, that’s what I’m going to do more of this year. And hiking. I feel like my life has hit a plateau, it’s not going anywhere and that’s because I don’t have some goal in reach. Even short-term. I have nothing to strive for. I’ve fallen into a routine of work and (occasionally) school. I’ve had this job for 3 years, saved nothing, and have nothing to show for it. WAIT HAPPY THINGS

..nothing. I’m going to Dunkin Donuts. That’s happy. I started this entry at 4:30, fell asleep, and finished it at 9:30.

OH YEAH Shanon let me borrow ON THE ROAD and it’s so good. Thank you Shanon and Kerouac.


  1. “When you practice za-zen, don’t ake any conjectures on good and evil! Don’t try to stop your thoughts from coming. Ask yourself only this question: ‘Which is my own spirit?'” — Bassui i have no idea what za-zen is, nor do i have a clue who Bassui is. anyway, this was the piece of wisdom for the weekend from my “Wisdom of the East” desk calendar. i hope it makes more sense to you than it does to me. p.s. PUT IT UP ON YR FACE

    Comment by panda518 — January 7, 2006 @ 2:52 pm

  2. thank you for the smile

    Comment by zig_mover — January 7, 2006 @ 6:26 pm

  3. Dude my sleeping pattern is the same My mom woke up at 430 the other morning & came downstairs asking wy I was awake & thought I was doing drugs or something ahahaha But I’m up till that time EVERY night you still bullshitting people off the phone at work? ahah

    Comment by backseatblues — January 7, 2006 @ 3:28 pm

  4. last night i was talking to some guy and his computer just magically started working (after no internet for 2 weeks). and i was like uh, i don’t know why it works now..maybe the virus scanner.. or something. he goes “you’re just making that up, aren’t you.” me: yeah, pretty much. sometimes people won’t let me off the phone until i tell them what i did to fix their internet, and it’s midnight and i want to go home. him: fine with me, as far as i’m concerned you’re a genius, bye! so yes, still bullshitting people off the phone (but honest about it)

    Comment by zig_mover — January 7, 2006 @ 3:59 pm

  5. I recently got over my sleep pattern. 5:40AM to 1:30PM — luckily I’ve been going to bed usually around 12:30 now and getting up around 9AM. I like daylight. Never owned a car, dont know how to relate to that, ahh. Yes, Dunkin donuts is happy. There are lots of happy things there. *one dunkiin donuts visible at every block in boston.*

    Comment by fox_orian — January 7, 2006 @ 3:31 pm

  6. last night i fell asleep at 5 woke up at 830 for work I FEEL LIKE ASS. drove past 4 dunkins on my 10 minute drive to work. good times. 2 of them know my order.

    Comment by zig_mover — January 7, 2006 @ 6:29 pm

  7. also, cute. The title says Neil.

    Comment by fox_orian — January 7, 2006 @ 3:32 pm

  8. you did have low standards with that little girl. haha. OK IM GUNNA GO DRINK/CUT NOW. BYE

    Comment by radioxsurgery — January 7, 2006 @ 3:59 pm

  9. oh and on the road is suuuch a good book.

    Comment by radioxsurgery — January 7, 2006 @ 4:20 pm

  10. I KNOW WTF

    Comment by zig_mover — January 7, 2006 @ 6:29 pm

  11. HAHHAHAHHAHA i miss you

    Comment by zig_mover — January 7, 2006 @ 6:29 pm

  12. date adam. hahah ;]

    Comment by off_stage — January 7, 2006 @ 5:02 pm


    Comment by zig_mover — January 7, 2006 @ 6:30 pm

  14. HE’S BI WE’LL HAVE A THREESOME hahahahaha ;] ew 🙁

    Comment by off_stage — January 7, 2006 @ 7:12 pm

  15. just found ur page randomly. that whole sleeping situation, goign thru it myself. and about ur epic crush, same here….i had one of those, finally got what i thought i wanted but it wasnt. so i kind of know what you are going thru kidd. uhm…add me if u want…can i add u?

    Comment by cherrykittie4 — January 10, 2006 @ 3:26 am

  16. add me.

    Comment by zig_mover — January 10, 2006 @ 7:08 pm

RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URL

Leave a comment

Powered by WordPress