www.neil.blog memo to myself. do the dumb things i gotta do. touch the puppet head.

I’m confused. I’ve never had to deal with the loss of someone I was this close to. I’ve never felt closer to another person- never felt as though- well- I know she got my last letter, my drunken chicken scratch making sure she knew how much she meant to me and how much she was the impetus for my move to New York (it was one year ago last week).

I love you I love you I love you

C. said he wont know what to do when he goes home and she’s not there to jump out with her arms spread and yell and make everyone everything okay

I love ytou

hay friends
things in nyc are okay!

i got a job, doing IT work. it’s great. i go all over the city fixing different things. i work hard, i am good at what i do, i enjoy it, i dont sit in a boring office (or at my house) reading message boards all day anymore.

Moving in with my girlfriend next week. Relatively nervous. I think it will be nice, though. What should I expect? Tips? HALP

here is a picture of meg and i. check my flickr for a couple more from the summer.

that’s all for now.
love, neil

I was back in Worcester to see my mom graduate college. Hung out in Allston with Rod & co., partied in Worcester with Joc, Maura, Chris, and others; saw my family, lots of fun was had, beerz, The Model, saw Ana!, jacuzzi’d with Tiel, lunch with Natasha and Eponine, missed a couple people I really wanted to see but I couldn’t deal with 9 hours on trains and buses in one day sorry

It was nice to see my friends and laugh and realize I haven’t had a really good laugh in 2 months, even my family was a riot, I miss that

But being back in NYC around all this energy and action and I don’t know I don’t think I could live in Mass again, at least for a while.

I work at Neighborhoodies again, in Brooklyn. It’s decent.

Went to court yesterday for my skateboarding thing, panicked, took the $95 fine instead of standing my ground with the NOT GUILTY plea and facing a possible CRIMINAL RECORD and I can’t believe I fucking did that because that’s so much money

My brother Glenn is coming to hang out tonight WHAT CAN WE DO u guise

Just checking in. I wish I had realized the pawn shop across the street would be in this photo.

Neighborhoodies shut our store down, so I lost my job. Fuck a buncha that! I loved working there. Ohh well. I need a new job.

The city is great. I’m getting by. I’m exhausted. Went to a bar last night, a 3 minute walk away. Tried to get home and needed a cab because I didn’t know where I was. I almost started crying, being drunk and exhausted and wet and lost but really I was just being ridiculous.

Write me a letter, I’ll write back.

hay NYC is great i’m having a lot of fun and meeting new people and working a lot and walking and just haaaangin

come visit, i’m a 5 minute walk from the fung wah dropoff

today i got a summons for sk8boreding. i have to go to court? hahahah

ok more uptade l8r BYE mis you!

hay u guise,

i’m moving to NYC in a week. sorry you had to read about it on livejournal. i know we don’t hang out anymore. i’ve been working 55 hour weeks, i don’t hang with anyone anymore, i mostly drive to allston after i get out of work at 1030 and visit rod.

i’ve been saying i was moving for almost a year, nobody really bought it, but here it is. monday is my last day at Cyberonic, thursday is my last day at Neighborhoodies, Saturday is my last day in Massachusetts. I’m not sure how long i’ll be gone, but i don’t think i’ll be back in a few weeks or anything.

i’ve never been away from home any longer than scout camp for a week. i’m kind of scared. but i’m 21 (happy birthday to me, last week) and i live with my parents and work lame jobs and it’s time to go try something new and exciting and take advantage of my youth and whatever. ok no i don’t feel like explaining this or talking about it any longer

if you’d like to see me before i leave, uh i guess you can come see me at the natick mall. i’m working every night until thursday. also 1-8 today, sunday til 6. i’ll be free mostly after work, if you want to hang out super late, pickin apples, making pies, put a little something in our lemonade and take it with us

bye

Finally feels like a new year. I want to say I feel Changed but now I’m back to the way I was before. But some Decisions were made and I think I’m ready for some sort of new phase of my life. I don’t know what step 1 is but I’m going to figure it out.

Not updating this thing for so long was a mistake, now I have nothing to read back on. The past few days are like months in my head so I guess it’s better this way.

I work at Neighborhoodies in the Natick mall now, so if you’re ever around there come visit. I’ll make you a tshirt.

I miss everything as soon as it happens. Every awesome moment I’ll never get to relive. This summer has been amazing. I wish there were more pictures. I’m glad Tina took some tonight

I just worry about how fast everything is changing and how does it make sense that I already miss it

I need to get back on track with growing up. I am missing something.

It is not normal to be single for 2 years (or has it been three? How long have I had this bracelet on?) (it probably is not normal for my memory to be this poor) when was the last time I even went on a date?

i don’t like how i feel right now and i want to go to sleep

be my girlfriend. Have you heard the new National record yet? It’s not too late for it to be our Summer Album. I’ll bring it over.